Find our time

life
during it we'll find
hopefully, one time or another
but, maybe not ever
when we get an insight
and see that IT IS TIME

it is time
to stop being the bystanders
ogling on what's whirling around
in front of us
behind us
above us
below us
and just ogle on

do we think it's
to jump in and take control
to not just follow
to see that right is not always the norm
and majority is not always the truth
to KNOW rather than just follow
and take control rather than "go with the flow"

coz at the end of the day
acceptance won't help us
being 'in' isn't really a purpose
hedonism won't last forever
leaving it all as it is won't make us satisfied

if we think that's more to life
than the ticking of a clock
and doing everything as we'd feel like doing it
seconds... eat when we feel we'd like to
hours... play when we feel we'd like to
days... study when we feel we'd like to
weeks... sleep when we fell we'd like to
months... pray when we feel we'd like to
years... start getting serious when we feel we'd like to
well these just won't cut it

find something we want
and work towards it
it'll give us satisfaction
more than we know it

want to lose weight?
reduce our food today
want to stop smoking?
start by reducing by 1 today
want to be more active?
start by 1 set of exercise today
want to be crisp during OSCE?
practice 1 examination today
get involved in OUR lives!

and keep going
and going
and going
until eventually
we got it
or we don't, but we can strut around
knowing that everything there is to be done
are all in the done list

we owe it to ourselves to do something useful
as this life is but once
don't let it ticks away~

find a cause and something to stand up to
coz if we don't stand up for something
we'll fall for just about anything

even though it involves writing a mere blog post beside the kitchen sink :)

...HUMANS HAVE THE ABILITY TO FLY, BUT MANY DECIDE TO CRAWL ANYWAY...

Tabiat tak apa...

***************************

"mat... aku tengok ko selalu subuh gajah. Jomlah cuba bangun subuh on time"
"hmm, ko sibuk apa? biarlah aku punya amalan. ko jaga ko punya sudah"

***************************

"aku tengok makin ramai orang yang x jaga pergaulan semua. risaulah"
"ala... xpe, yang penting kita tak buat"

***************************

Anda pernah lalui situasi ini? Atau yang sewaktu dengannya?
berhati2lah... jangan terlalu mudah melepaskan tanggungjawab kita sebagai seorang muslim keatas saudara2 muslim yang lain.
kerana sebagai manusia kita sering lupa, dan kita sering mengabaikan tanggungjawab kita, terutama ketika bersendirian. atau dibiarkan sendiri di tengah2 ramai. kerana tiada siapa peduli. kerana jaga tepi kain sendiri. kerana "kubur lain2", kata kita.

semudah itukah kita melepaskan tanggungjawab kita?

firman Allah dalam Al-Quran: Surah: 3.Al-'Imran.
110. Kamu (wahai umat Muhammad) adalah sebaik-baik umat yang dilahirkan bagi (faedah) umat manusia, (kerana) kamu menyuruh berbuat segala perkara yang baik dan melarang daripada segala perkara yang salah (buruk dan keji) serta kamu pula beriman kepada Allah (dengan sebenar-benar iman) dan kalaulah Ahli Kitab (Yahudi dan Nasrani) itu beriman (sebagaimana yang semestinya), tentulah (iman) itu menjadi baik bagi mereka. (Tetapi) di antara mereka ada yang beriman dan kebanyakan mereka orang-orang yang fasik.

Bukan kebiasaan manusia untuk boleh berubah dan berbuat baik bersendirian. Mungkin boleh, jika anda kuat dan tabah. tapi percayalah setiap orang yang menegur itu ambil kisah tentang anda. dan terimalah dan berubahlah, untuk diri kita dan untuk Islam. cubalah ambil kisah tentang orang yang mengambil kisah tentang anda, sebelum mereka patah hati dan membiarkan anda terus dibuai mimpi indah duniawi. Sampai bila agama ini akan terus dikaburi kebenarannya oleh penganut2 yang mengaku Islam dan mahukan syurga Allah, tetapi tidak mahu berusaha kearahnya.

dan bukanlah tulisan ini kerana saya baik dan sempurna. jauh sekali. tetapi dengan harapan bila saya menulis perkara ini saya sendiri akan berusaha melakukannya. dan tegurlah saya jika saya salah. ingatkan saya bila saya terlupa. kejutkan saya bila saya tertidur. cucuklah bila saya terleka. dan insyaAllah saya juga akan cuba lakukan sedaya saya. saya juga manusia... seperti kamu, kamu dan kamu.

jangan biarkan umur kita terus berlalu. syurga bukan untuk yang bersenang-lenang di dunia.

hargailah ia

Gunakanlah masa yang ada
Supaya diakhir harimu
dan diakhir minggumu
dan diakhir bulanmu
dan diakhir tahunmu
dan diakhir hidupmu
kamu, dan juga aku
tidak tertanya-tanya kemana perginya
masa yang terbiar begitu sahaja

rugilah siapa yang merasakan dirinya sudah cukup sempurna
dan tidak mehu cuba memanfaatkan masa untuk melatih diri dan memperbaiki
biar perlahan, tapi perlukan perubahan
jangan biarkan dirimu kaku
tidak berubah
lengai

kerana diakhir nanti
kamu, dan juga aku
akan ditanya ke arah mana masa kita dipergunakan?

It's how you look at it...

It's amazing how we think of something affects how it makes us feel. One similar thing can give totally different meaning and cause mood or feeling to arise in someone.

For example, as i was walking to the bus stand to take the bus to the train station... I saw only 2 people there. As I had waited for about half an hour for the bus yesterday, it seems to be good news that there weren't many people waiting, i.e. The bus is running today. Say if I look at it from another point of view... The bus just left and there are now only 2 people waiting... I missed the bus.


Yep. It's how we look at it... Probably not all situations though... But the power of mind can alter everything.

It's what we believe is what really matters in the end.

So choose the one that makes you happy... And choose the righteous one...

Instead of cold miserable snow... Its a chance to play snowball fight and hv some great time with friends.

When we stand in front of a shouting crowd... We can choose to hear them jeering, or cheering for us.

And try not to lose the smile... Those who can't smile would give everything to smile. So those who can... Should do it more often.

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Push off a cliff

sometimes we feel the need for someone to give you a nudge just to move on...
we wanted so badly to change (for the better, hopefully) but can't seem to take the first step...

ever so often what we need is just to DO it...
if you want something... TAKE it...

for example, we feel the need to take more care of of health...
to do more exercise and eat more healthily...
to cut down the chocolates and sugar and salt and fast food and junk food...
but only to find ourselves going to the shelves we want to avoid during shopping...
again and again...

or, when we feel the need to focus more on our studies...
and the need to shove off the distractions like games, or TV shows...
as long as we're sure that what we want is for the good...
and will pay off one day...

the fact is, in doing anything...
we need will power...
and the first step to using the will power is to acknowledge that it's there...
waiting...
to be awakened and to be utilized...
we are too comfortable in our current situation...
and forgot that there's a lot more to be done...
and there's a lot more to improve...

so just do it...
because in the end...
what really matters is what you achieve...
and in the end...
it's all about self-control, prioritizing, and doing what's right...

so if you'll excuse me, I need to jump off a cliff...
I mean, figuratively :)

and another sketch...

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Graded Pencils!!!

i bought graded pencil... just to satisfy my art-junkie urges that comes once in a while... now im thinking about buying an easel and learn to sketch book. hehe. ;) weekends are always so enjoyable...

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sometimes...

its fun to post something... with nothing on it...



































what do you guys think? Comment BELOW! :)

Boneka

Permulaan penuh keajaiban
Kehidupan penuh persoalan
Pengakhiran belum ketahuan
Terus hidup dengan mencuba
Walau tak tahu apa akhirnya...


Baru start klinikal... Sy tak tahu ape2... memang dah lama perasan... But now i have to do something about it... Hehe...

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The stranger tour

Allah swt is the longest and the most important relationship in or life.

Why are we making Him a stranger to us?

16:18 four, should you try to count Allah's blessing, you could not count them.

3:160 If Allah should aid you, no one can overcome you; but if He should forsake you, who is there that can aid you after Him? And upon Allah let the believers rely.

9:40 ...when they were in the cave and he said to his companion, "Do not grieve; indeed Allah is with us." And Allah sent down his tranquility upon him and supported him with angels you did not see...

3:31 Say, [O Muhammad], "If you should love Allah, then follow me, [so] Allah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful."

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Anatomy... done?

Tribute to my faithful companion...

Today... I had my anatomy exam.which will be the last, as long as I pass it. If I failed, then there will be resit later in summer. But that's not what I wanna talk about.

Its fun when I first started to learn anatomy a few years back.it had always been one of the things that I looked forward to in medicine.now its kinda sad that its all finished. Its amazing how long out took, and I trust what I learned were a mere gist of the real deal.

I really learnt a lot from it.seeing how miraculous human bodies are its a constant remind of the Almighty. Each layers and compartments beautifully arranged, the vessels, small yet having such great importance for humans.every minne glans and cells exists complementing each others making this God's creation a piece of functioning being.

I had a great time...and I'll miss getting the smell of the preservative chemicals all over my clothes. And getting people making wierd faces when I walk near them after a dissection class.I'm gonna miss taking a bath, just to find the smell is still in my hands when I wanted to eat.I'll miss all the other details that might not be appropriate to be written here.

Till the time comes.
Starting clinical teaching soon.
Gonna miss lectures...NOT

Missing
Marvels
Machineguns (WHAT?)

M

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mari belajar

Exam dah dekat... Mari belajar :-)

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Jalan pergi dan pulang

Orang selalu kata, hidup ini suatu perjalanan... dan hidup ini suatu perjuangan.

Mungkin dari satu sudut perkataan itu sebagai pemberi semangat. Supaya tidak mudah berputus asa dan terus berusaha. Namun kita perlu sedar kepentingan hala tuju, atau goal dalam kehidupan.

Sedar atau tidak perangkap masa seringkali terkena kepada kita. Setiap kali terasa lapang dan senanga jarang sekali untuk kita ingat masa susah yang bakal tiba nanti, dek kerana kita lengah pada masa sekarang.

Kadang2 terasa senang bila ada teman di perjalanan, yang faham inspirasi dan intipati dasar perjalanan kita. Mungkin kadangkala kita mencari insan tersebut bertahun2 lamanya. Mungkin ada yang seumur hidup mencari tetapi masih tidak terjumpa. Mungkin ada yang di depan mata tetapi masih mencari...

Orang kata, dunia dikejar takkan dapat. Kepuasan dunia yang dikecap pada setiap tahap, tentu akan ada tahap seterusnya yang datang, yang diidamkan. Walau kadangkala kerap juga terjatuh dalam perangkap dunia, mengejar yang fana'. Jangan kita lupa akhirat yang kekal abadi, janji Allah yang pasti.

Jika dinisbahkan tempoh dunia dan tempoh akhirat kelak... selayaknya diletakkan 0:infiniti. Bukan bermakna dunia harus ditinggal sepenuhnya. Ada orang cakap saya suka ambil sesuatu secara extrim. Tapi bukan dalam hal ini. Kerana dalam hal kehidupan dunia itu bersulam juga dengan hal akhirat. Kedua2 perlu selari, seiring. Bukan bitinggal dibuang salah satu.

Cuma prioriti perlu dibetulkan. Kata orang, sambil berjalan... junjunglah akhirat di kepala, dan bimbitlah dunia di tangan. supaya apabila yang dikepala hampir2 jatuh, yang di tangan boleh diletak sekejap untuk perbetulkan yang di kepala. nanti diambil semula untuk sambung berjalan... jangan letak di tempat yang salah :). betulkan prioriti kita...

Namun lumrah manusia selalu terlupa. Tetapi perlu diingat jangan sampai lupa kita jadikan alasan untuk setiap kesalahan, untuk melarikan diri dari rasa tanggungjawab. Kerana Allah memberi kita ikhtiar... maka lakukan sesuatu untuk memperbaiki kekuranganmu. Juga aku akan lakukan yang demikian.

Kerana hanya dengan itu, mungkin ada sedikit harapan mendambar syurga Allah, yang kekal selama lama lama lama lamanya...

semoga saya dan kamu lebih menghargai masa yang terhad, yang bakal menentukan keputusan di masa yang tidak terhad~

3rd year

It's already the first weekend of 3rd year. What an intimidating week. Partly because of the foreshadowing of the workload that's gonna come suck me dry. Partly because there's gonna be an exam in week 6, which means there's only 4 weeks left, before the exam week.

And partly because I don't think I am adequately ready to go through this academic year. Not mentally, and not emotionally. Why is it so hard to let go of things that I know will only be one of the many factors that are going to drag me down the hole. Why can't I be more objective in determining what's good and bad for me?

If I knew growing up will be this hard, and if I had the chance to, and if it is possible to, I would slow down my growth process. It would be really nice if I can go back to being the ignorant baby I was back then, when everything was right with my world and I would only be bothered when I feel hungry or uncomfortable of the warmth in my diaper.

Back to present time now, due to unforeseen circumstances, one of my housemates will be moving out of the house to another house. Although it is a stone throw away, it still isn't a pleasant thing. Especially when he's been my housemate for a whole year last year. But it has to be done, for the betterment of others.

My housemates this weekend (although it's only the first weekend this academic year) are around UK today. I went to the south somewhere near Southampton, one to Birmingham for an alleged "meeting", and another one is out of my radar. Think I either forgot to ask or it didn't register although I did ask. Probably the latter.

Thing's been wild. As the new house was like a hurricane-torn town when I arrived. Much has been done to "rebuild" it. Now it's waay better.

And, as usual, I've been collecting works to be done over the weekend, but I've been convincing myself (although it definitely untrue) that there are things more worthy to do in my free time. Like, browsing the internet, doing online shopping, and watching the new TV series like Grey's Anatomy and Big Bang Theory, or movies such as The Expandables. Yeah, life's been great. Amongst the whining I do about how LOADSABLYLOAADSS of workload I have. Well, to be perfectly honest, most of the work is going to occupy most of my time in the near future.

Sometimes I loathe people who tries so hard to show others how important and busy they are. Especially the ones who walks in front of others like a saint, but in reality isn't really. It's probably the satisfaction of looking down onto others by making themselves believe that they are a better than the others. Or the probably just like the attention that they get by acting all saintly and the praises that people say about them. Or It might just be the thought that other people seeing or knowing about their "bad" side is just unbearable. It is also possible that it's only me who are not very happy with others who are obviously better than me.

Enough to say I should be ready to take a leap of faith. And hopefully land on a mattress of a heap of cotton or feather. Well, the other outcome isn't that nice...

So, to summarise... I am really not in a stable condition... and I hope the sanity that I'm barely holding on to will stay with me for a while longer... and there's more works to come, so I better be ready. Thanks if you've read what I've been writing spontaneously out of my head. Do pray that the condition I'm in is going to turn for the better :)

cheers,
M

Back for my 3rd year in Leeds~

Alhamdulillah, after a long journey, Fer and I arrived safely in Leeds (although we almost became frozen food in front of his house, haha). So here's the story :)

We were supposed to board a plane at 10.15am (Malaysian Time). We got the the check-in counter when it was still open... but there seemed to be something amiss. Another friend who checked-in earlier told us the seats were nearly full when he did it online. So we waited. The staff attending the counter told us that the plane was overbooked, and we (Fer and I) can only board if they can find a seat for us (which already seemed unlikely even from the beginning)...

So we waited and waited, until the plane eventually left -_-"

So as usual, when denied boarding, the airplane company would shower us, the supposedly on-air passengers with gifts...

Well, in a way. It's kind of a blessing for us. Although we had to spend more money for the airport parking and wasted some few hours of our time while we waited for them to give the replacement flight and gifts... we got these in return:

- Breakfast voucher at the airport
- Hotel stay (5-star Pan Pac KLIA) until the time for the replacement flight, which was at 2am the next day. Meals included for passengers
- Our replacement flight from Dubai International Airport to Manchester Airport was a business class. So we got to try for the Business class lounge at the airport. We must have looked so lost there... :P
- A voucher for another free flight with the same airline for KL-Manchester~


Alhamdulillah, I guess it was a blessing in disguise~

- I got to meet my grandparents and uncles and aunt and cousin for it :)
- I got to see the first year students' first time flight. Reminds me of myself 2 years back. How everyone was brimming with hopes and expectation and spirit and dreams. It made me secretly vow to work hard for the coming years~


Like someone i know likes to say, "God works in a very mysterious way"...

There's always something to learn, so open our eyes wide when unexpected things happen, there's probably something we don't want to miss happening around us :)

Al-Hadid: 22-23
No disaster strikes upon the earth or among yourselves except that it is in a register before We bring it into being - indeed that, for Allah, is easy - In order that you not despair over what has eluded you and not exult [in pride] over what He has given you. And Allah does not like everyone self-deluded and boastful -

i'll upload the pics later,k :)

raya and the aftermath.

On Eid (10th Sep 2010), in the morning during the salam2 session with my mother's side extended family, I got a text, saying...

salam aidilfitri dan maaf zahir batin depd tuan haji h***** dan 4 madunya: m*** k****, a** r******, r***** c** w**, dan f*****.

I have to cencor the names because I don't have their permission to put their names up here. Although I know it's from a friend and he's not yet married (as far as I know), it still made me think for a few seconds... before getting the fact that it's another fancy way of saying Eid Mubarak :). And i think the 4 wives are actors from a certain movie, probably. who knows?

Since I haven't sent any Eid wishes to my friends, I decided to make one. And comes up with this, with my best effort trying to make use of old time Malay:

Bersempena keberdatangan purnama syawal... hamba kepingin mengirim salam kemaafan andai hamba terkhilaf. harap tuan hamba sudi memaafkn kslhn hamba. -M*****-

Then I sent it to the numbers that I have, which is very few, in fact. Coz I got a new number after I went back for summer holiday back in June. And I left the old SIM somewhere...

Anyways, I got some interesting responses:

Two of them were too kind to make their own version of "archaic Malay" texts:

Beta maafkan. Beta juga mohon maaf zahir batin. slmt hr rya aidilftri.. xD

Wa syawal klasik melayu. Bgtu jualah patik duhai tuan hamba. Patik memuhun maaf sgala salah silap. Salam lebaram maaf zaher btin.

Some were kind enough to reply. And others were also kind to smile to the text (well, at least I hope so XD)


3rd day of Syawal, went to a cousin's wedding.

4th day of Syawal, travelled home to Johor and receive the honour of a friend's visiting. But he didn't bring any of his 'madu's, he came with his 2 younger brothers and 2 cousins.

5th day of Syawal. Went beraya to 9 houses (pari, izhar, nad, shakan, atip, haziq bakar, nado, yus, pjord, xde yg termiss kan? :P). with around 30 friends from SAKTI~


*************************************************************************


hmm... pejam celik pejam celik... tinggal 3 hari sblm pulang ke Leeds, bumi penjajah. Juga bumi tempatku menimba ilmu, secara formal. hampir 3 bulan di rumah. sebulan penuh Ramadhan di rumah...


mungkin ada baiknya kita tanya kembali diri kita, dalam sibuk2 menziarahi keluarga dan rakan2. apa kesan ramadhan pada kita...


-masihkah kita mementingkan diri dengan membuat extra lane ketika jalan sibuk dipenuhi kereta?
-mampukah menahan kehendak untuk makan berlebihan setelah sebulan berpuasa menahan dan mengawal nafsu makan?
-adakah berbeza tahap ibadah dan perhambaan diri kita pada Allah setelah menjalani latihan meningkatkan amal selama sebulan?
-adakah semakin cepat hati berbaik sangka walau dalam keadaan yang kelihatan seperti sebaliknya?
-berjayakah kita mengikis tabiat2 yg kurang elok spt merokok dan membuang masa?



(sorry for the long pictureless post. I'll upload it later when I can grab hold of them XD)

7 September

***

2008, must be before i went to leeds in september~

"Munzir nanti, kat sane tu, jangan lupe pasal ilmu2 agama sekali. buat la hafazan dan belajar apa yang patut. nanti dah habis belajar, lagi xde masa. kalau nak tunggu habis belajar, kemudian tunggu kerja, tunggu berkeluarga, sampai bila2 nnti akan tertinggal pasal akhirat. kita nih hidup ada tujuan yang lebih besar," lebih kurang ujar ayah. bersahaja, tetapi penuh bermakna. aku dah ayah sedang memandu pulang ke rumah, tidak ingat dari mana, pada hari tersebut.

aku mengangguk, tanda faham.

***

15 nov 2008

ayah visited my blog here and he dropped a comment.

"Salam Munzir,
It's nice to c your blog for the 1st time.. at least ayah hope Munzir is coping well. If u have any problem, don't hesitate to email to ayah or mama, we try to assist in watever way we can.
If Munzir happen to go to Sheffield, ayah wonder whether the Islamic Centre is still at No. 10, Severn Road, Sheffield. It is here that ayah had spent about a year staying here during my 1st year. So did Prof. Dr. Abd. Rashid (CMU) who stayed here for 3 years.
Lastly, take care and dont 4get to attend any program during holidays to fulfil our obligation towards Dakwah, another obligitory assignment that we always put aside.
Salam sayang from ayah, mama, kakak, abang & Firah di Msia...
Wassalam.
Ayah"

***

11 jan 2009

Ayah passed away. I received the news from a phone call. as I was in Leeds at that time.

***
7 sep 2010

Ayah would've been 52 today. The man i looked up to in life, and the person i will always remember, all the time. insyaAllah, ak akan cuba jadi insan berguna. kerana naluri manusia itu, semua mahukan kebaikan.

cuma kadangkala belum tersentuh hatinya untuk menghargai2 masa2 yang berlalu tanpa henti. pada kadar yang sama. tak kira masa. walau tidur, walau beribadah, walau sedang mabuk dibuai arak dunia, walau gembira bagai baru mendapat durian runtuh, walau sedih dengan hati hancur luluh. masa tetap berlalu...

cuma kadangkala kurang tabahnya, untuk terus menerus mencari jalan ke arah penambahbaikan. yang kadangkala tersentak dek bicara sinis rakan, atau terpesona melihat insan lain "gembira" dengan kelalaian, atau hilang percaya kerna dosa2 lampau yang masih bermain di fikiran. Allah itu Maha Pengampun. cari dan carilah keampunan dan kebaikan, walau 1000 kali kau jatuh, atau tercucuk duri ketika mencari...

saya, dan kamu, tak terlepas dari ujian Allah SWT. smoge Ramadhan yang hampir habis ditempuhi memberi kekuatan untuk kita terus beramal dan berubah kepada yang lebih baik. sebagai orang Islam, kita patut yakin dan percaya segala kesakitan dan kerosakan yang melata di bumi nih ada ubat dan jawapannua pada Islam~

***

selamt hari raya, maaf zahir batin. Eid Mubarak~xyah la letak gamba ye, korang pon dah tengok melambak kat internet :)

selamat mengejar perubahan, now and always~

24 ramadhan...

hmm... Saje2 try update blog guna phone... Testing2... Hehe

Hari nih buat kuih raya... Utk hari raya... Seperti biasa minggu akhir ramadhan setiap tahun rumah mesti sebuk buat kuih raya... Alhamdulillah, masih sempat tilawah baca al-quran (akhir2 ramadhan nh, xle tinggal, hehe) Memandangkan update pki phone, xleh upload gambar... Keke

2 minggu lagi, dah nk balek ke leeds... Smoga semangat utk belajar melambung tinggi selepas cuti panjang nih, dan smoga menjadi lebih matang dan bertanggungjawab. Hehe...

Yelah, tgk kawan2 skolah dah start bekerja... Terasa diri dah tua. Hehe. Probably its time to leave my childish hobbies behind... Tp sgt best, hehe.

sudah 15 ramadhan... sudah separuhkan pengajianmu?

tup... tap... tup... tap...
hari ini sudah 15 ramadhan...
mengambang sudah bulan di angkasa gelap...
sudah separuh ramadhan berlalu...

bagaimana amalku?
sudah khatamkah kitab suci al-Quran?
atau sudah 15 juzuk di baca?
atau sudah 1 juzuk?
atau 1 helai kah?
atau sudah 1 ayat dibaca?

bagaimana hatiku?
sudah bersih lembutkah dibelai bulan barakah ini?
boleh berlinangankah sudah air mata yang persis kemarau?
timbulkah titik sayu tatkala teringat dosa2 lampau?
atau masih sama seperti sebelum melangkah ke Ramadhan?
atau makin kurang eloknya?

bagaimana sikapku?
sudah terterapkah sikap selayaknya pada seorang muslim?
atau masih berlari menuju ke arah itu?
atau meniti dengan langkah bayi?
atau terhenti?
atau terkebelakang pula dari dahulunya?

hati ini kuketuk lagi...
lagi dan lagi...
jika syurga Allah mahu dikecapi...
masakan masa terbaik untuk perbaikan dibiar terabai pergi...
tanpa insurans tahun hadapan sempatkah lagi...
barangkali tahun inipun tidak menjenguk ke penghujungnya...

gunakanlah sepenuhnya yang masih berbaki...
untuk mengejar redha dan ampunan Tuhanmu...

Europe spring 2010

x kuasa membuat post panjang lebar dan susah nak upload gamba... aku pon buat video trus... njoy!

Spring Trip Ep.1 [Linz, Austria]

Alhamdulillah, with the ample time given By Allah, I, along with some friends went on a trip to 3 [2 of us went to 4] European countries last spring break...

So here's our story...


From London we took a flight [,obviously] to Linz.





It's evident from our faces that everyone was so excited. After long school period, holiday finally comes around! These were taken in front of the airport in Linz. From there, we took a shuttle van to the nearest train stop [I call it a train stop as it doesn't look big enough to be called a station].




On the way, I saw a building, and can't help noticing its resemblance to our beloved medical school building back in Leeds. So, a sensible thing to do is to snap a picture of it :).




The sensible thing to do when we arrived in Linz was to look for our pre-booked accomodation. The not so sensible thing not to have a map to go there... so we went around the area, confused of the quiet surrounding and the unfamiliar ground. Tickets for the tram was quite peculiar, as there are 3 types... MINI. MIDI, and MAXI which have their own number of stops allowed for each.

With the help of a couple, we managed to find the place, YOUTHOTEL at last right before dusk...


The next morning, we had our breakfast (bought from a gas station nearby the night before) and shoot off to the city. We took our luggage along as we're heading to Vienna later that day~



So we went to the city on Linz....

-and took pictures:
some funny ones, of buidings,
of a sleeping friend, of the worst tasting "mineral water" I've ever had,
of breath-taking sceneries,
and of the food we had for lunch.


It was amazing as it was tiring :). We then head to Viienna....
Let's leave that for another day...

Forgive me friends... cause im so lousy

might just be me, but i never consider myself as being any good at friendship

forgive me friends
for when i see you make mistakes
i chose to keep quiet
i chose to not advice you
as i fear for the friendship
but how wrong was i
true friends do not hesitate to give advice
if that's what's needed to make improvements
although it might cost the very friendship

forgive me friend
for when i make mistakes
i expect you to keep quiet
and burst in anger if you give me advice
although i know that's what i need
although i'm sure i'm better off with it
for this, forgive me

forgive me friends
as i expect you to always be by my side
and always support me in what i do
but i am not always by your side
and often in silence, stab you in the back
for that, please do forgive me

forgive me friends
for i expect you to always tell the truth
as i know that friendship do not grow with lies
but i sometimes do the same
without hesitation, without shame
for that, i beg you to forgive me

forgive me friends
for wanting you to back me in my sad moments
but be by you only on your happy ones
for this, i'm ashamed, and i ask for your forgiveness

with all my flaws
i ask for forgiveness
as i did my best
but my best wasn't good enough
so i wander around
in search for strength
to change to improve, for the better
and i found the source, clear as ever
it is in you friends, that i gain it

**happy fasting~ Ramadhan mode =)

Ramadhan... it's not a month of weakness

Hai orang-orang yang beriman
diwajibkan atas kamu berpuasa
sebagaimana diwajibkan atas orang-orang sebelum kamu
agar kamu bertakwa (Al Baqarah : 183)

Ramadhan is around the corner. For muslims, this is the most blessed month according to islamic calender. And muslims around the world will be fasting for the whole month, before celebrating Eid ul-Fitr on the first day of the next month, Syawal.

Just a quick reminder, although muslims fast during the days of Ramadhan, history have shown that it is not a weak moments for muslims. Historic events such as the battle of Badr (17 Ramadhan, 2H) and the opening of Makkah (10th Ramadhan, 8H) happened during this blessed month.

So friends, let's all cherish the coming of this blessed month, and make aims to be a better, stronger muslim, a more devoted and steadfast servant to Allah.

May we find strenghts in:
- Performing salah and fasting the best way possible.
- Training ourselves to read the Quran daily.
- Making other organs fast too, from doing sins that are sometimes so sublte, Abstaining our mouths from talking bad about others. Our eyes from looking at inappropriate things, hands..., ears..., legs..., hearts..., bodies...
- Learning to eat sensibly, and healthily.
- For those who smoke, and thinking of stopping. Ramadhan may be the answer to put an end to the habit.
- Repent for our pass sins and try our best to not make the same mistakes again.
- Leaving habits that waste a lot of our time, but is not beneficial.
- Cleaning our hearts from the sickness of envy, ujub, takabbur, and all other negative feelings towards others.


may we succeed in becoming a better person come this Ramadhan, insyaAllah.

sis's wedding pics...

here is the link to my sis's wedding pics. the ones i managed to upload :)

ok... here's one of my artpiece :-)

it's not that good. need more practice and time. the picture Idrew it from is below.

*i do not own this one.

HOME =) you can't afford to not love it

1.

simple tools :). this is just about all i have for now. planning to further add to the family of drawing equipments. thinking of charcoal and wooden pencils, colours, perhaps :)

NEVER had enough time (or, probably enough drive) to pursue this passion of mine. I've been working on polishing my drawing skills. since i have all the free time i want in this holiday, might as well gain something from it. maybe i'll post some later, after i get better at it. now they still hasn't any showable value. haha. to show how enthusiastic i am about this, i even joined a forum for artists (as in people who draw as oppose to people who sing and act)/artist-wannabees, which i'm quite sure will be out of my mind by the time i finish writing this post.

2.

Some of the books i plan to read :). probably i won't finish all of them, but there's no harm in dreaming big...

I'VE been throwing away most of my time playing DotA earlier in the holidays, now i've no more interest whatsoever to play it. it gets pretty boring after a while. so i'm actually picking up books to read =). how cool it that. i've been longing to not have to read book day in and day out during term time, but ended up with books, still, in the holidays @_@

3.

you can just about see the malicious intent in his eyes :)

AND, lastly, Kabu (the notoriously naughty ball of fur) managed to once again help himself to destroy, for the umphteenth of time, another mouse. :). he'd already rendered the Wii sensor useless during my stay at home. very productive now, keep it up "lil' kitty" :).

ok, need to sleeep now :)

Wasiat Abu 'Ubadah

Sebelum kematiannya Abu ‘Ubaidah berwasiat kepada seluruh prajuritnya:

“Saya berwasiat kepada Anda sekalin. Jika wasiat ini kalian terima dan laksanakan, kalian tidak akan sesat dari jalan yang baik, dan senantiasa berada dalam bahagia.

“Tetaplah menegakkan shalat. Laksanakan puasa Ramadhan. Bayar sedekah (zakat). Tunaikan ibadah haji dan ‘umrah. Hendaklah kalian saling menasihati sesama ka lian. Nasihati pemerintah kalian, jangan dibiarkan mereka tersesat. Dan janganlah kalian tergoda oleh dunia.

Walaupun seseorang bisa berusia panjang sampai senibu tahun, namun akhinnya dia akan menjumpai kematian seperti yang kalian saksikan ini.

“Wassalamu’alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh…”

snatched from: http://dakwah.info/buku-tarbiyyah/abu-ubaidah-bin-jarrah-2/

Alhamdulillah

Syukur kerana Allah permudahkan urusanku dalam pelajaran. InsyaAllah panjang umur aku kan melangkah ke alam tahun 3 di Leeds. Runsing juga memikirkan dugaan dan cabaran yang bakal menyapa. But I chose this road, and I'm willing to be soaked in blood to get through this.

Cuti Summer menjelang tiba~ 3 bulan- tiap kali kusebutkat tempoh cuti ini, secara refleks semua orang akan mengatakan perkara yang sama, "paaanjanggnyeeeee". Iye, memang. aku x pernah nafikan. tetapi kepanjangan cuti ini juga membawa bersama dugaan dan cabaran, bukan sekadar kesenangan dan kerehatan.

I have to face it. we all should face it. time is valueable. we're not kids anymore. masa terluang bukan hanya untuk berehat2 bergurau senda. It will run out, eventually. and the challenge is to make the best out of it. I would really love to look back at the end of this long period of holiday and smile knowing that I spend it well and I spent it wisely. Almost all of my holidays, to date, at the end of it i felt quite regretful not having it spent in the right-ish way. Im taking the time off from UK & uni environment to try and reassess myself. tambah mana yang kurang. kurangkan yang terlebih. betulkan mana yang masih silap. kukuhkan yang sudah betul.

hoping for the best. hoping for a shift of paradigm, hoping to change into a better person... for myself, and for others.

change is hard. but hard is not impossible.

post exam

hurmm... bile pikir camne kosongnye rase pas abih exam...

ak terpikir betapa ak nih sangat education-based...

bile lepas exam... jadi ilang punca. haha

i need to get a hobby...

selain asyik buang masa, sayang la...

so aku buat pon buat la kek untuk kemba 2 orang housemate...

tp dorang bukan kemba... birthday je same... haha...

first time buat kek cheese... risau gak awal2...

it turned out quite OK i guess :)

Komputer insani

manusia macam komputer~

ade yang ok, ade yang rosak...

ade jugak yang di tengah2...

kadang2 ok, kadang2 rosak...

kadang2 boleh format... jd ok...

tp bile antivirus gagal menjaga... jd gak tak ok...

kadang2 boleh ok je bertahun2...

sekali pergi tempat lain je... rosak trus... macam manusia juga...

ade yang boleh dapat virus dari komputer lain dalam "network" yang sama...

jadi kena la pilih2 juga jaga dan tgk2kan komputer lain dalam network tu...

dari luar tak nampak beza sangat...

tapi dalam boleh jadi sangat2 beza...

HDnya, RAMnya, Processor-nya, cam hati manusia... juga akal dan fikiran...

kalau mahu, boleh dinaik taraf...

tapi kalau tidak mahu, ketinggalanlah...

namun, lambat tak semestinya tak sesat...

cepat tak semestinya tepat...

perlahan tak semestinya tertahan...

laju tak semestinya tahu...

memang "best" kalau dapat komputer yang elok seumur hidupnya...

tapi memang lumrah untuk dapat virus infection, crash+BSOD, sudden idiopathic death, overheat, rosak sebab kene hempas, air tumpah, dan sebagainya...

bukan kemahuan... tapi ketentuan...

pilihlah yang boleh dipilih, selebihnya serahkan pada tuanmu hai sang komputer...

dan serahlah pada TUHANmu hai sang manusia...

hari ini umur komputer ini bertambah satu...

from another point of view... hidupnya yang tinggal berkurang satu...

selamat hari lahir buatku, semoga pertambahan umur sejajar dengan pertambahan kefahaman dan pengecilan kejahilan...

yang terselit di celah2 kompleksiti sebuah komputer, dan seorang manusia :)

most things are better and easier to be done earlier

most things are better and easier to be done earlier, but most people choose not to.

dirty dishes, for examples. you can either wash it straight away and avoid any unpleasant smells or tough stains that might be there over time. imagine the dishes are left until mould starts to appear.

another example that i'm sure most of us can identify with is our work, whether it's paper work or homework, or occupational work. leaving them to the last minute results in half-hearted works and imperfections in every aspects. not to mention the lack of sleep that oftenly accompany last-minute works, AKA the-work-that-is-done-on-the-day-before-the-deadline.

or our 5 times obligatory prayers. we do it early, we get more time to perform it properly, we get larger "pahala", and longer period of feeling at ease after doing our duty. but we tend to procrastinate till the the very end of the prayer time. sometimes even exceeds the time just to do other works, or sleep for that matter.


Hakikat agung disebalik surah Al-Asr:

وَالْعَصْرِ
إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَفِي خُسْرٍ
إِلَّا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا وَعَمِلُوا الصَّالِحَاتِ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالْحَقِّ وَتَوَاصَوْا بِالصَّبْرِ

1. Demi Masa!
2. Sesungguhnya manusia itu dalam kerugian;
3. Kecuali orang-orang yang beriman dan beramal soleh dan mereka pula berpesan-pesan dengan kebenaran serta berpesan-pesan dengan sabar.



biarpun selanjut mana waktu pada seluruh zaman dan sepanjang mana kelangsungan hidup manusia pada semua masa, namun di sana hanya ada satu cara dan satu jalan hidup sahaja yang membawa keuntungan dan keselamatan. Itulah cara hidup yang telah dijelaskan sempadan-sempadan dan batu-batu tandanya dalam surah ini. Selain cara hidup ini adalah sia-sia dan rugi belaka. Wallahu'alam. (dipetik dari Tafsir Fi Zilalil Quran)

how ungrateful we are

Oh, how easy it is to overlook the mountains of goodness God gave us, and to clearly see the few hardships and trials from Him. Ya Allah, make me a thankful servant.

there are 2 things worth remembering; the good deeds people do to you, and the bad things you do to people. And 2 things that ought not be brought up; the bad things people do to you, and the good deeds you do to others.

in numerous occasions we forgot to remember and praise ALLAH, if only once ALLAH "forgets" to provide us the air to breathe from, what would happen to us?

in the state of happiness, measure how grateful you are to Allah, while in grief, be wary of your forgetfulness.

c'est la vie

If only all it takes is to pop a pill

to pump myself with a powerful will

moving about, not just standing still

come what may, I'll face it with thrills

to see the world as simple as I saw it

to feel safe and happy and not full of "watch it"s

to obtain bliss and keep on having it

then I should, and I will pop it

but as days pass and time goes by

facing new stuffs as they come by

forced to greet the old ones with goodbyes

and learn to embrace it, or i'll won't get by

if I doze off in this lullaby

I will run out of time to amend loose ties

"when the going gets tough, the tough gets going"

The Park Bench

Found 2 poems with the same title... so i figured is should just put both. then i changed my mind after reading them both, think i'll just put 1 in. the second's too dark and gory, i don't want people to get wrong impressions bout me :D

Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree.
Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown,
For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day,
A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play.
He stood right before me with his head tilted down
And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"

In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight,
With its petals all worn - not enough rain, or too little light.
Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play,
I faked a smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side
And placed the flower to his nose and declared with overacted surprise,
"It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful too.
That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."

The weed before me was dying or dead.
Not vibrant of colors: orange, yellow or red.
But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave.
So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand,
He held it mid-air without reason or plan.
It was then that I noticed for the first time
That weed-toting boy could not see he was blind.

I heard my voice quiver; tears shone in the sun
As I thanked him for picking the very best one.
"You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play,
Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see
A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree.
How did he know of my self-indulged plight?
Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.

Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
I vowed to see the beauty in life, and appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose
And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose
And smiled as I watched that young boy, another weed in hand,
About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man.

Pie @ BLR (Burley Lodge Road)

SATURDAY: played volleyball at the Manchester game by MSSM (Malaysian Student's Society of Manchester). Got 2nd place. ^_^ we were very happy coz we didnt expect to come home with anything~ lol. we played for fun during the weekends only. no serious training (at least not on my part).

Us: before the game

Us: during the game

Us: after the game.

P/S: snatched the picture from remy's facebook. :P

SUNDAY: buat Pie... ade2, apple n pineapple. 1st time try. hehe. from a random recipe from the internet. it's not that hard. as long as there's some experience with flour based foods to know the right consistency for the dough. Thanks to qawiy :), i just helped him to make it...

There's the picture of my very own mixer... looks like Kenwood Chef?

And these are the pies ready to be cooked~

And lastly, the cooked and cut apple pie~

very nice things to do the weekend after handing in the SSC essay draft. :)

manusia ini...

...memang bukan mudah difahami
bukan macam ketip kuku...

...mudah nampak kesalahan orang lain
tapi biasa lupa kelemahan diri sendiri...

...suka kalau orang lain penuhi hajatnya
tapi selalu lupa penuhi hajat orang lain...

...suka kalau orang lain gembirakan dirinya
namun biasa lupa menggembirakan orang lain...

...suka ingin lihat orang lain berubah
tapi untuk mengubah diri sendiri bukan mudah...

...suka orang faham perasaannya
tapi jarang cuba memahami perasaan orang...

...kadangkala cepat terasa
tetapi mengharap orang lain bersabar dengannya...

...amat mudah lupa
tapi kerapkali marah bila orang lain terlupa...

...lemah dan mudah pecah
...selalu terleka
...mudah jatuh sakit
...mudah terpedaya

Spend some time to laugh~

Maher Zain - Insha Allah -

Everytime you feel like you cannot go on
You feel so lost
That your so alone
All you is see is night
And darkness all around
You feel so helpless
You can’t see which way to go
Don’t despair and never lose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side

Insha Allah x3
Insya Allah you’ll find your way

Everytime you can make one more mistake
You feel you can’t repent
And that its way too late
Your’re so confused, wrong decisions you have made
Haunt your mind and your heart is full of shame

Don’t despair and never loose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side
Insha Allah x3
Insya Allah you’ll find your way
Insha Allah x3
Insya Allah you’ll find your way

Turn to Allah
He’s never far away
Put your trust in Him
Raise your hands and pray
OOO Ya Allah
Guide my steps don’t let me go astray
You’re the only one that showed me the way,
Showed me the way x2
Insha Allah x3
Insya Allah we’ll find the way

gula, kopi, teh, dan hot choc Morrisson's

gula apabila merasa dirinya lebih gula daripada gula-gula lain,
dan merasa bahawa dirinya melampaui batasan gula,
dan tahu segala macam perangai gula seperti telapak tangan gulanya,
maka kadangkala si gula lupa bahawa dirinya bukanlah sebuk kopi,
atau uncang teh atau coffeemate atau serbuk coklat morrisons,
maka dengan memandang enteng gula laen si gula yang menganggap dirinya bukan gula,
dengan senang lenang menyakiti dan memperbuat gula-gula lain sewenangnya,
maka gula-gula lain akan berasa tidak senang dengan gula tersebut,
dan memanggil air panas untuk melarutkan gula yang ingat dirinya bukan gula,
namun apabila terkena air panas...

LARUT JUGA
maka tatkala itu si gula akan sedar,
bahawa dirinya juga gula,
walau dalam diri merasa bahawa gula-gula lain boleh diinjak sesuka hati,
namun hakikatnya, gula tetap gula,
sedarlah dirimu wahai gula-gula sekalian,
kerana kalian takkan selamanya di dunia,
mungkin esok atau lusa,
kalian akan disudu keluar dan dimasukkan ke dalam cangkir kopi,
atau teh atau hot choc morrisson's.

it's time to freak out, isn't it?

meeting tutor in 2 days...
with only around 2 sentences in my essay...
shoot~

where have i been?


keywords: tutor, essay, freak out! :S

those days

the three of us really liked reading comics. and we enjoyed playing games. we would go to the CCs to play starcraft. we would go to kedai game which also had tons of comics and read comics for 50 cent each. then we would silently swap between us to avoid paying another 50 cent for the same comic. and we would play the vidoe game there. can't recall the type of console though, and also the price for each hour. being the youngest, my bros would usually pay the costs, coz they really love me. they still do :)

although sometimes i wasn't really up to going out to the cc or the kedai game, i would still follow them there. the reason being i wouldn't want to be put in a position where i would have to "betray" either my parents or my brothers. i was afraid that my parents might ask where my bros are, and i would have to tell them. on the other hand, if i'm with them, they won't be able to ask me :D.

our parents had it clear cut for us. back before 6.30pm. we sometimes came back late (due to having to wait our turn to play game at the shop). once Ayah waited for us to come back. we were late, can't exactly remember how late. he had a cane with him. we all know what happens next. serve us right. :P

we also enjoyed playing with LASY. we had all the compenents named. like kasut, papan, bulat panjang, bulat besar, A kecik, A besar, H kecik, besar, orang, roda. one of the many games that we like to play with LASY was each of us will make our very own "weapon". then we'll arrange the leftovers as our targets. using rubber band as "bullets", we would then shoot the targets down. Mama will always ask us to arrange everything back in the box after we played.


this is how LASY looks like in case you're wondering~

suddenly remembered these stuffs. i had a workshop on "molecules of emotion". one of the task was to try and recollect the past. and those were the few things that came to me. there's lots more in my memory. but i think this is enough for this time.

p/s: how did the time pass so quickly @_@

someone really needs to smile more~

i have a friend. he's really quite a character. i can't understand him. really, he can be laughing happily with me one second, and the next second it could be the total opposite.

we went ice-skating one day, although we actually planned to go to the gym after class on that particular day. i could sense that he was reluctant at first, but i guess he wanted to spend time with his precious friends. he went.

*************************************************************************************

he took his first step into the rink. i didn't see him smiling. it was agonising i guess. he must be thinking about how miserable it was last year when he went to the skating rink. i looked at him, his face looked so serious. i daren't go near him.

i saw him struggling to maintain his balance. he must be thinking what a waste of money it was to play something he can't even do properly. i think he has a bit of a psychological problem. he's the kind of people who are used to being good at things that he does. he can't stand being a mediocre chap. he needed to be more. at things that really matters to him. i thought he was pathetic, feeling so bitter just because he couldn't skate properly, without even trying his best to.

so giving up is just an easy excuse for him not to do it. not letting people see how unskilled he was at it. i pity him. he should be more adventurous, try new things, learn new things. i watched as he looked at his other friends who are skating gracefully, thinking isn't anyone gonna help teach him?

i guess he then decided what a waste of time to feel miserable and waste his time there. he decided that he should at least try and have fun. so he started skating, and fell on his second step. but he kept on trying. he ended up being able to skate around the rink without difficulty (after falling 3 times, one of which he managed to bring a freind down with him).

so i went to him and say, " see, it's not so bad isn't it. you just need to smile more and enjoy the moment. savour the learning process and have a great time. although it sometimes mean wetting your jeans [from falling on watery ice]. you need to learn to let go, and be happy about it :D"

welcome to the school of detective

although most of you readers might not know, im actually studying in a detective school, although they like to keep it descreet and call it by another name instead.

here:
-i learn how to "interrogate" by asking the right questions to "suspects".
-i learn to take note of things that others who didn't attend a detective school might just .
-i learn to make further investigations if im not sure of what had actually happened. or to make further tests to determine that my deduction is actually correct.
-i am taught to be observant and careful not to miss small details that might be the key in solving a case.
-during the training of becoming a certified detective, i had to hone my skills by practicing it on other detectives in training, simulated suspects, and also real suspects around the area.
-deductions can sometimes be easy, but not in all cases. i also find that it gets even harder the more i progress through the detective school.
-i also learn how to take precautions when doing my investigation so that i will not get what the suspects have, or carry around bugs from one suspect to another.
-it is not an easy task, as suspects sometimes cannot fully comprehend what we detectives say, thus we need to not use detective jargons when interrogating suspects.
-although it's very interesting, it is quite tiring to train to be a detective as it can suck the spirit and leave the body dry. i sometimes wondered why i chose to become a detective and go thru this rigorous training.
-i learn to use my senses in a better refined way. to hear what others can't hear, to see what others can't see, to feel what others can't feel, to use my limbs dextrously.


just trying my best to enjoy it every step of the way~
fingers crossed :)
palms open wide ~

you dont stop playing coz u get old, you get old coz u stop playing

let's start this post with blooper reel from house :D

tomorrow's my first official day at the ward. just for a day~ hope it'll be a great experience~

regarding the topic. i had lishi training as part of my PPD (personal and professional development) module, under the valueing diversity slot. it's another kind of chinese traditional exercise. kinda like tai chi i'd say, but with different movements.

the instuctor just kept on stressing about how the chinese are health concious people who takes responsibility of their own health. he tells us about how the old can wake up in the morning to do exercises in the parks, and still be mobile and flexible. but the young are becoming 'westernised' in the sense that the practice is more like and 'old people stuffs' kinda thing. well this statement isn't based on any prove (cant seem to bother looking for any).

what interests me is the fact that how he said its human nature to like having wonder drugs that can heal and keep us healthy rather than work it out ourselves and take responsibility of our own health. he told us how patients were usually reluctant when he told them about exercises...

doing ssc on rheumatoid arthritis...

the more i learn the more i think it's impossible to learn all these stuffs... someone should really consider breaking medicine into several subjects~ would be more bearable to learn... hehe

im generally happy nowadays~ not sure why though :P
blissfully going thru the passing days~
skipping some lectures in doing so~
piling up some works for later date~
and doing some~

eating out~
waiting for scholarship~
rearranging the room in hope that it would give me the long awaited boost for the term~
to no avail~

ah...
good days~ good days~